Hi (WARNING. My language is not great because im from sweden)

What is the difference between hocd or being gay?
I think I have hocd but last night I red the differences about hocd fears and being gay fears
and all forums said that gay people only scared that what others would think about them.
And the promblem is that when im around my family members, friends and girlfriend, I feel like im lying to them and when i see new people, I always think "Ok you are nice to me now but how would you think/threat me if i was gay" and feel like i have to scream that "im gay" and get huge anxious. When my hocd suddenly started I didnt sleep at all that night because i thinked that I cant be gay and didnt know what is going on. And also thinked that what is killing me still is that "WHAT OTHERS WOULD THINK ABOUT ME" and that is bothering me a lot

I have had little fears of being gay since 9 or 10 years old when i found out what "gay" means and feared "what if i am gay what others would think". But at the puberty i was pretty confident that i'm straight. And even before puberty i had no interest about gay stuff.
And to this day i have been in relationship abt 9 months and before hocd suddenly hitted me I loves my gf and still liking her a lot. Anyway i have always liked girls, watched lesbian/straight porn, want allways to have sex with my gf, have crushes only for girls.
Help me

And could you tell me that is this fear normal?